Old Scar by Geoff Bagman turns a long drive to Cape York into a mischievous roadside yarn between a father and his impatient son.
At a creek stop, a tall tale about a fearsome old crocodile builds from teasing into panic — before the murky water delivers one last surprise.
Old Scar
By Geoff Bagman
(Cape Trip, Boy, Dad, Creek.)
Bagman ©2019
Boy’s Too old to walk there,
He’s too young to drive there.
been glued to an iPad since he was a baby.
From the City to the Cape,
he’s been drivin’ alright.
Drivin’ me flamin’ crazy.
Are we there yet? Are we there yet?
from the passenger seat
Dad, I wanna drink,
Dad, I need to pee..
I’m soo bored..
is there something to eat?
Pull up soon, I can go behind a tree.
Bloody Child, you’re drivin me wild
It’s not all about you, you, you..
Alright, if it’s des’prit,
I’ll get ya some res’pit.
Next creek. I’ll stop. Will do.
He jumps out, Here old man, hold onto my Vans??
I’m not gettin’ em dirty..
okay.. sweet.
His overpriced shoes are there in my hands
He’s in the bush with socks on his feet..
A bit of Mischief, comes to mind
I reckon I’ll have me some fun
Let him get started, give him some time
make up a story and let it run …
“While you’re out there I’ll tell you son..
bout A 20 foot Croc named Ol’ Scar.”
Rumour has it, He took on a Hilux and won.
over there boy, see the bull-bar?.”
*Rolls eyes*…. “Bullshit dad.”
Young buck looks over, and sees some metal
all twisted and bent in the ditch.
His eyes widen.. just a little,
I got him! he whispers
“son-of-a…”
BETCHA BOY!!
Five’ll get ya Ten, there’s a slide round that bend.
This is a good time, to remind ya..
Best if ya don’t turn your back on the water..
cause he’d be in that pool there behind ya.
*Widening eyes* .. “ummmm b-bullshit dad.”
His eyes get wider, and wider still,
darting ‘tween all three.
Back and forth, from the rippling pool
to the bull-bars remains and to me..
Don’t Look around boy, Don’t make eye contact,
remember, I’m holding your shoes.
I don’t have to outrun a cranky ol’ salty.
I’ve just gotta outrun YOU.
B-b-b-b-bullshit Dad…..
By now, all flow has come to a halt,
Not the creek. Him.
Stopped midstream..
Nothing’s moving, so it’s time for a jolt,
I take a slo-ow breath… then I..SCREAM!!!!.
Still boy STAND STILL I yell.
I see ripples, *** just freeze where you are,
I’m sure you’re going to be okay… maybe.
As long as THAT ISN’T OLD SCAR!!!!!
Bristling hair One foot in the air
his face was pale with shock
The flow had restarted and
I hope he’d just farted
at that moment he let go of his
composure..
He hauled-arse back and jumped in the car
like the devil himself was behind him
I laughed thinkin’ hey, I can relive this day.
and each time I do.. I’ll remind him.
But I remember with a shiver looking back at the river,
as we started to drive away..
I looked again twice. Thinkin’ ohhh dear, that’s nice
I probably, shouldn’t say
Something I’ll never disclose to the kid,
though I s’pose I really should oughta.
Beady eyes, rounded snout, slowly rose out,
from the middle of the murky water..
It’s not a real pain when you have to explain
was it an Alligator or a crocodile
It’s said that the ‘gator will always “see ya later”.
and a croc sees you “after a while”.
Don’t turn your back on the water, folks..
***
this is where the author declares how difficult it is to use the word… ripples.. in a poem…
(not much rhymes.. with.. ripples..)
Keeping The Verse Alive
Old Scar is shared with permission from Geoff Bagman through Keeping The Verse Alive, Country Campfire’s bush poetry preservation project.
By preserving poems like this, we’re helping ensure the stories, humour and characters of country Australia continue to be enjoyed for generations to come.
Geoff Bagman
Bush Poet • Poetry Reciter • Entertainer • Professional Fool
Geoff Bagman is a Queensland bush poet, poetry reciter and self-described professional fool from Banana. His work mixes storytelling with self-deprecating humour, dad jokes, ham acting and good-natured mischief. His Country Campfire collection begins with Old Scar and will grow as more of his poems and performances are shared.
Poems, recitals, photographs, stories and original works remain the property of their original creator and are shared by Country Campfire with permission.
